All aloneee ..

Coming home to an empty house is actually a pretty lonely feeling. I always thought I liked being alone .. But now I know that I don't like it for too long ..
I found out that my parents are actually first coming home sunday, so now I'm planning on going up to our summerhouse on friday. Just for the weekend. I could also stay here and go out partying with some friends, but .. I don't really know if I feel like it. We'll see.
This makes me think of one of my favorite episodes of Sex and the City, I Heart NY, where Carrie wakes up feeling cold because her window is open, and feels how the seasons are "clicking", and how it's becoming autumn. It makes her feel lonely, so she calls Mr. Big and asks if he ever feels lonely. He, as a man who never says the right things, just says no .. So she asks if she can come over. And then she sees that all his furniture is gone, and finds out he's moving to Napa. But the part I love most, is the ending. She comes into his empty apartment, and finds 2 things. A record they listened to a few days earlier "Moon River", with a note on it saying "If you ever get lonely" .. And in front, an envelope saying "If I ever get lonely", with a planeticket to Napa in it .. It's soooo sweet .. Sigh .. And I watch WAY too much Sex and the City .. But it just makes me so happy. So maybe I should have a "Happy hour" every evening, where I watch Sex and the City!

Tomorrow is just another day .. Wake up early, school .. So depressing. It kind of feels like a waste of life. Always the same thing.
When I got home this evening, I didn't really feel at home. It's hard to explain. Everything looked the same way I left it last friday, but still everything felt strange. I've lived here my whole life, but I don't feel any connection. And I know I won't be sad the day I move. Sure, I'll miss the house I've grown up in, and all my friends. But I'll be happy to move on.
I keep trying to find out why I feel the way I do .. And I think it's because this town is too small and quiet for me. I love cities like Copenhagen, where something's always happening .. And you can get around at any time. Shops are always open, and there are always people around. This town is like a 5th grade camp-trip .. Lights out at 10 o'clock. I guess that's the main reason. Sometimes I over-think about things like this. That's the reason I can never fall asleep in the evening. But I've figured that I better make the best of living here .. I can't go around all the time thinking "Oh god, I wish I could move away from here" .. Not that I do that, but .. still. And it's only just over 1 1/2 years till I move. So that's that.

This post has gotten really long all of a sudden, so I think it's time to wrap it up now ..
Nighty night